Monday, May 23, 2011

One of these days...

One of these days I will make sure I actually have all of the ingredients necessary for a recipe before I start cooking. I make assumptions that I have certain ingredients before going grocery shopping and never double-check to make sure my assumption was correct and then the next thing you know I have a hot stove and a recipe started with missing ingredients.

Sometimes I get lucky and it's something as simple as milk or an egg and my wonderful neighbors are there to help me out. Tonight, however, I need 1/4 cup of Teriyaki sauce. Not something that the neighbors are likely to have on hand and/or want to share 1/4 a cup of. I would just skip it or try to substitute it with something else but it's a pretty major ingredient in this recipe which is titled, "Orange Teriyaki Beef." There are only three major ingredients and I'm missing one of them. You would have thought a three-ingredient recipe would have warranted a double-check that I actually have all three ingredients but never make assumptions with me. I'm as unpredictable as a loose cannon.

Pat is on his way to the grocery store. Thank goodness! Maybe a good rule of thumb would be to always assume I DON'T have an ingredient and just buy it no matter what. I like to a full-stocked pantry anyway so what would it hurt? Obviously a better plan would be to just double-check but it's clear I'm not capable.

One of these days I might also be able to cook an entire meal without making our smoke detector go off. In the winter it isn't nearly as embarrassing because your windows are closed and no one can really hear it, I don't think. But it is pretty darn loud. But now that it's getting nice out (and by "nice" I mean a storm with torrential winds, rain and hail just rolled through), our windows are open a lot more often and anyone walking down the street will definitely know when I'm cooking.

They say that practice makes perfect and as my two-year wedding anniversary approaches (one week from today), I have officially been "practicing" quite seriously for two years. When, exactly, will the "perfection" kick in?!?!

Oh, good. Pat is back with the sauce. Now if I can avoid screwing up this recipe, we will finally be able to have our dinner. 

Thursday, May 19, 2011

It's a new day

You'll be happy to know that I am in a much better mood today. I was even feeling happy and energized this morning and that NEVER happens. The first part of my day that went well was that I actually left for work on time (well, very very close to on time anyway).

I spent my commute singing to the playlist "my favorite sing alongs" and was really enjoying my commute until I was stuck in traffic on the innerbelt bridge, about half way through my commute and I looked down only to find that my gas light was on. I had a bit of a panic attack because I had no idea when it came on or how much longer I had until I ran out of gas. I pushed my luck and drove it all the way to the street where I work. But lucky for me, I didn't run out of gas! And I paid under $4.00 a gallon. Who knew that one day you would consider $3.96/gallon a "bargain."

When I got to work, I started my Pandora music player and the first song randomly selected for me was Mrs. Robinson by Simon and Garfunkel. Talk about my luck today! I received an email that a pair of shoes I ordered earlier in the week, were named the Editors Pick! I had a super productive day and when I left work, for the first time in what feels like forever, it wasn't raining!

When I got home, I got the mail to find that I had received the new pair of shoes I ordered online and they FIT! I also had a bachelorette party invitation for my favorite bride-to-be, Aubrey. And I was even excited for Pat when I saw that he got both his Sports Illustrated AND his ESPN magazine, both in the same day! The weather was still beautiful and I was able to take the Gradster for a nice long walk.

I cooked a yummy dinner (new recipe, too) and was listening to Jack Johnson En Concert, which I borrowed from my neighbor. It's his live album from the year we saw him in concert, the concert where we got engaged! Enjoyed a nice, cold beer with dinner and watched American Idol.

I hope you had a good Thursday, too!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Whatever Wednesday

I'm copying the name of this blog from a local radio station, but WHATEVER. For Whatever Wednesday I'm going to say whatever I want in my blog. It doesn't have to be a story, it doesn't have to be funny, heck, it doesn't even have to make sense for all I care. It's whatever! This should be quite liberating for me...here we go.

I am sick and tired of the rain. There is a pond in our backyard again and the rain does nothing good for my mood, my flowers, keeping my freshly groomed dog clean and most importantly, it does nothing for my HAIR! Not to mention, spring is usually one of my favorite seasons. This has not been much of a spring at all. I really dislike you right now, Mother Nature. And remember, I defended you alllllll winter long. I swear I was the very last person in Cleveland to complain about the snow. But I'm complaining now and you are officially on my "list"!!! I don't know what that means, exactly. But you're on it.

I made tater tots for dinner tonight, at my husband's request. I felt very weird about it, given the fact that we are both 27 years old. I felt like we should be eating them in a cafeteria, not at a kitchen table discussing our grown-up jobs in our grown-up house. But then Pat asked me to throw one at him to see if I could get it in his mouth and suddenly, it felt completely appropriate that we were eating tater tots.

My allergies are awful this spring. Mostly in my eyes. I haven't been able to wear contacts for a week. Each time I try, my eye is irritated and infected by the end of the day. Thank goodness the sun hasn't shown it's face in weeks so I don't have to worry about the fact that I don't have prescription sunglasses. I will be that girl that has sunglasses over top of their regular glasses. If you see me, just pretend you don't. It will be more comfortable for both of us.

A spider dangled down next to me while I was going to the bathroom tonight. Naturally, I screamed. And since Pat was in the basement, I knew I had to take matters into my own hands (or shoe). So I killed it (I think). It fell in to the trash can. Dead or alive, I can't say for sure. But I had to repeat "Oh shit" out loud the entire time I was killing it. Somehow that gave me the strength I needed. Another milestone of maturity that should probably be reached before I bring children into this world is the ability to kill a spider, the size of a dime, without swearing.

I guess I should try to end this post with something positive... hmmm...I got my hair done today. But it's completely frizzy now because of this AWFUL WEATHER. Thanks a lot, Mother Nature.

So much for being positive.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Just another day in paradise

So first, let's state the obvious: I'm an inconsistent blogger who is absolutely incapable of blogging every day. Heck, it seems I'm not even capable of blogging every week! In my defense, I worked more in the months of March and April than I have ever worked in my life. Does that make up for it? I didn't think so. Moving right along...

My lack of blogging has even caused me to stop reading other people's blogs because it was only making me feel worse about the fact that they were keeping up with their blogs and I wasn't keeping up with mine. Waahhhh! So, today is the day where I dive back in. What to talk about, what to talk about...

Why don't I tell you about my day? The good news is, if you're not interested in hearing about my day, you can simply X out of this browser. It's much easier to shut me up virtually than it is in person. :) For those of you who think you're interested in hearing about my day, continue reading but let me warn you, you might not really want to know.

The day started off most like every day in Cleveland lately. Lots and lots of rain and all the things you had hoped to get accomplished outside (pulling weeds, rototilling dirt, spraying weed killer, etc.) were not possible and all the things you did NOT want to get accomplished, like doing 50 million loads of laundry, were pretty much forced upon you. Tthanks a lot Mother Nature - I would flick you in the ear if I could.

So that's what I have been doing. Lots and lots of laundry. Pat was working out in the garage on my plant stand (more on that later) and I was in the basement trying to be domestic. After a few hours, Pat came inside to tell me that he was heading to home depot to get some more wood. I responded with "that's what she said" (no joke, that is really what I said. I am not mature) and then he left. I went back to folding and sorting clean clothes. About 20 minutes later, I went upstairs to put some of the clean clothes away.

When I got up to the kitchen, I was greeted with an old toothbrush and a piece of paper on my kitchen floor. Very random and quite interesting, I thought to myself. I proceeded to walk around the corner to find a trail of kleenex, tissue paper, clothes tags and many other miscellaneous items all leading to our bathroom. I knew instantly what had happened and that this wasn't a good situation.

The bathroom door had been left open and Grady had been in the trash. Seems like normal dog behavior and nothing to panic about, right? Well, maybe for you. Maybe when your dog gets into the trash he or she just shreds some items and drags them around the house. But we all know that Grady is not your "average dog." He doesn't chew. He swallows. Whole. In large quantities.

When I got to the bathroom I found that the garbage can that was once completely full this morning was now almost completely empty. Unfortunately, the trail of items leading to the bathroom only made up for about half of the original contents. The other half were all in Grady's stomach. Again, this is not a good situation. Every awful thing that you can imagine being in the garbage can - was. There was WAY too much stuff for a dog, even of Grady's size, to try and pass. There were paper products, plastic products, wrappers and much more that I knew for a fact he had consumed. All I could think about was that once again, we would be tempting fate if we allowed Grady to try and pass all of this "stuff" on his own. I knew I needed to get all of this out of Grady's stomach before it entered his digestive system.

The first thing I did was call Pat at Home Depot to tell him about the situation and ask him why he left the bathroom door open when he left -you know, pretty much blaming the entire situation on him. Not my finest moment, I know. That seems to be a trend in our household - something goes wrong and I figure out a way to blame the husband. I'm working on that. Deep down, I knew the real person to blame was the one who looked at that overflowing trash can this morning thinking, "I should really empty that" and then did nothing about it. And that person was (drum roll please)... yours truly.

Anyway, after we got off the phone from our very pleasant conversation, I went straight to the computer and googled "using peroxide to induce vomiting in dog" or something along those lines. I had a former coworker whose dog also ate random, inappropriate things and I remembered her telling me that she used peroxide to force her dog to throw up and that it worked. I have never tried this with Grady before because we usually never catch him soon enough or know for sure whether he swallowed something he shouldn't have.

But this time I was well aware of all that he had swallowed and I knew that it had happened within the last 20 minutes. I was convinced that it was in Grady's best interest to throw it all up and not even risk him trying to digest it. So blinded by the fact that I felt like I had to get Grady to throw up immediately, I skimmed right over all the statements like, "inducing vomiting should be done only if instructed by your vet" and "the procedure can be hazardous." Instead I went right to the instructions. It said to give your dog 1 tsp. of 3% peroxide for every 10 pounds your dog weighs. So I measured 6 1/2 teaspoons and got the peroxide in a cup. When Pat got home moments later, I told him to open Grady's mouth so I could pour the peroxide down his throat.

After helping me, Pat wanted some more information about this peroxide method we were trying for the first time. I told him that according to the website, it would take about 10 minutes for Grady to start throwing up. I also started telling him about some of the possible side effects and warning signs we should watch for like, "there's a chance that once he starts throwing up he won't be able to stop and if that happens, we need to take him to an animal hospital right away" and "if he doesn't throw up the peroxide then we have another problem because it can't just stay in his body."

The side effects and warnings didn't seem too bad when I was skimming over them on the website, but it sure sounded bad as I was saying them out loud to Pat. And I didn't even mention the "potentially hazardous" part. When I finished talking, Pat looked at me in shock, as if I had just coerced him to help kill our dog. Then he started asking more questions about the risks and where there is even an emergency animal hospital near our house, which I didn't have an answer to. Then I started panicking. What had I just done to our dog? I really started to wonder (and worry) whether or not I had made the right choice with the peroxide. I started to cry and second guess myself.

We barricaded Grady in the kitchen on the hard wood floors so that the throw up would be easier to clean up - my first rational thought since all of this happened. Pat pointed out that it had already been five minutes and Grady wasn't showing any signs of getting sick. "This obviously isn't going to work," Pat said. I tried to ignore him and just kept rubbing Grady's belly. A few minutes later, he started gagging and the throw up began.

I'll spare you the details because I'm sure this has been graphic enough, but I will say the peroxide worked and he completely emptied out his stomach. Pat was absolutely shocked by how much came up and told me he had no idea Grady had eaten that much. He then told me he thought I had made the right decision with the peroxide. What a relief!

If by chance you are interested in seeing my picture of the day on my photo blog, which is a picture of Grady's throw up, click here. Sorry, it's graphic, I know. But I can't think of a better picture that accurately summarizes how I spent my day today.

Maybe I should be thanking Grady for providing me with some much needed blogging material. Maybe he sensed I was going through a dry spell and just wanted to do his part to help me get back on the blogging saddle again.

Or maybe, just maybe, he was given a huge head and only a small brain and no matter how many times he swallows crap whole and gets sick, he can't seem to figure out that maybe he should only eat that freaking expensive Iams food we give him!

If you are STILL wondering when Pat and I are going to begin having children, let this serve as another reminder that our family is just not ready for that kind of responsibility.