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Tragedy in a mother's eyes

The motions were all the same with Graham's bedtime routine last night. I rocked him, we read a book, I kissed him goodnight and I put him to bed. The motions were the same, but the emotions I felt while doing it were different.

The devastating tornadoes that ripped through Oklahoma yesterday hit me much harder than I would have expected. It is so true what they say. Your perspective on everything in life is different after you become a parent.

This is not to say that before becoming a parent I wouldn't have been sad about the lives lost. I absolutely would have. But the report I heard about the elementary school that was completely destroyed and the students in grades kindergarten through third grade that were unaccounted for at the time of the report left me feeling completely overwhelmed with sadness.

The first thing I thought about was how horrific it must have been for the parents of those children. To arrive to scene of total wreckage where just hours before a school existed. A school where they dropped their students off like any other day.

The reporter said they were keeping the parents outside of the caution tape so the search and rescue team would be more successful in hearing the cries for help. How terrifying and helpless that must have been for the parents. I felt a level of empathy I never could have felt before becoming a parent myself.

Of the 51 lives lost, twenty were children. My heart breaks for the parents. I am so sad for the entire city, but my heart aches for the parents of the children who died.

I learned at a young age that life can be taken from you in an instant. But sometimes I think I still get complacent. Even though I've experienced tragedies and even though I try so hard to have an attitude of gratitude, I know I still take life for granted sometimes. I think we all do.

It's unfortunate that sometimes it takes a horrible tragedy to remind me that tomorrow isn't promised.

So even though the bedtime routine last night was the same as every other night, I hugged Graham a little bit tighter and held him a little bit longer than I did the night before. And as I stared into his beautiful blue eyes, I counted my blessings and was thankful.

My thoughts and prayers are with those in Oklahoma.

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