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My dog ate your wedding invitation

The last words out of Pat's mouth before we left for the grocery store were, "Did you dog proof the house?" We both walked back into the house to give it one more look. We moved anything made of paper off of the kitchen and dining room tables, we learned the hard way that moving paper into the middle of the tables isn't enough. He has long legs and he knows how to use them. Funny thing is, we have NEVER witnessed him jumping on the counter or our tables. He's at least smart enough not to do it in front of us. We made sure to close the doors to the bedrooms, we all know what he does with socks and underwear. We closed the doors to the bathrooms to prevent him from getting in the trash or the toilet (and he has done both). Finally, we shut the door to the basement just in case he could find any trouble down there.

Feeling quite comfortable with the condition of the house, we left Grady alone while we headed for the grocery store. Neither of us really wanted to go. We'd been cleaning our messy house all day and really just wanted to lay on couch and relax (and watch the PGA Championship if your name is Pat). But we knew we had to go. We had no food for breakfast or lunch tomorrow and I knew I would be working late on Monday. We tried to make the trip quick since neither of us wanted to be there. We were in and out in about 45 minutes, a pretty quick trip for us. But then I remembered I needed to get hangers so we headed to WalMart. Then we went to get some dinner at Penn Station and finally, we headed home. Total time gone was probably about 2 hours when all was said and done.

When we walked in the back door, I asked Grady, "Were you good while we were gone?" We looked around the house and everything appeared to be exactly how we left it. That is, until Pat spotted the little yellow magnet clip that belongs on the refrigerator, located over by the back door. Pat wasn't too alarmed by this, as he wasn't sure whether or not there had been anything in the clip before we left. I, however, was a little more concerned. That afternoon, I spent some time taking old wedding invitations off of the refrigerator to make room for the others and I put two different sets of wedding invitations in that yellow clip and hung it on the lower half of the fridge. It never dawned on me that he would actually take items off of the fridge! One of these days I will learn that anything is possible when it comes to Grady.

Worst case scenario, or so I thought, would be that he chewed up the invites and I might not be able to make out all of the words on them. Since we had closed off all of the bedrooms, bathrooms and the basement, I thought it would be fairly easy to find the remains of the invites. I looked in the kitchen, the dining room, the living room and the hallway and I couldn't find anything. Not even a small shred of paper. I looked under the couches, under the microwave stand in the kitchen, still, nothing. He ate two entire sets of wedding invitations including the invitation itself, the reception card and the directions. Both invitations and reception card were thicker stock paper and the directions were regular paper.

I was honestly in a state of shock at first. I shouldn't have been, since swallowing things whole is pretty much his M.O. But he has never destroyed all of the evidence! He was so close to getting off scot free. If only he would have put the magnet back on the fridge then we definitely wouldn't have noticed until we left for this wedding on Saturday. And by then, we probably wouldn't have even thought to blame him.

He is laying on the couch right now, on his back with his legs in the air. Maybe he's having a little trouble digesting all of that paper. I'm telling you this, he is lucky he is so cute and so hard to be mad at! It's going to be really embarrassing when we have to contact the bride and groom of the two weddings and ask for all of the information again.

"My dog ate my homework" sounds so much more believable now!

Comments

Holly said…
I feel for you! Moxyn loves to eat paper! And forget about socks and underwear - both of our dogs eat these! They have yet to eat things off the fridge, so I'm rather impressed by Grady's antics!
Leann said…
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

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