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Those things with four times as many legs...

Yes, I am a bit dramatic. But I am not exaggerating at all when I say that spiders (and all bugs with more legs than me) make me weak in the knees. Beyond the weakness in the knees, they actually make me feel slightly sick to my stomach, too.

As I was preparing my lunch today, there was a spider on the counter. It was about the size of my thumbnail, aka HUGE (I do not discriminate based on the size of spiders - I find them all equally disturbing). It was moving really slowly, which should have been comforting but actually freaked me out even more because I was waiting for it to speed up or, even worse, jump!

Since I was the only one home, I needed to kill it. I realize that spiders aren't bad and are actually important and necessary to kill other bugs. I understand all of that. I left a huge spider, perhaps a black widow, outside right next to our backdoor all summer and fall so that it could do it's thing. However, all bets are off when they're in my house. When it comes down to me and the spider, we can't coexist and only one of us pays half the mortgage to live here.

So now I have to figure out how I'm going to kill it. My first choice is ALWAYS a shoe. I am not comfortable with the kleenix/toilet paper route that works for Pat. Paper is not enough of a barrier between my hand and the spider. What if I don't kill it? What if I can feel it being squished? Or even worse, what if it touches my hand? SICK! But I'm also not sure how comfortable I am putting the bottom of a shoe on my kitchen counter.

I had to do what I had to do so I grabbed Pat's huge slipper with rubber bottom; size twelve slipper vs. half inch spider. I knew the spider didn't stand a chance, but I still screamed when I smacked the slipper on the counter. It was involuntary. Even though I wouldn't say I handled the situation with dignity and grace, I am quite proud of myself for standing up to that spider, defending myself, my house and my animals. (I already told you, I'm a bit dramatic).

Comments

Aubrey said…
I feel your spidey pain. I HATE them. Once, I killed one on my wall and had to wait 2 days for Tyler to come home and actually clean it up. I have that same phobia that a kleenex is enough of a barrier.
Sue Gabriel said…
My son - who is 18 - always calls me when it's time to remove a spider from the house. I know my future daughter-in-law will probably hate me someday. lol

For the record, I'll sometimes spray it with hairspray first. The chemicals tend to slow them down even more (I feel so mean) & I'm pretty sure they won't run away and hide.
Kristen said…
I ALWAYS scream while killing. I can't use shoes, I use a whole roll of paper towels or about 50 wipies. I'm worse than you possibly....

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